We are kicking off our 15th year of homeschooling. I can't believe we've been doing this for that long. In some ways it seems like we just started and in other ways it seems like it's been an eternity.
I must admit that my original reasons for homeschooling were not for religious convictions ~ as they are now (Lord knows if it weren't, I'd have thrown in the towel a long time ago!). The reason I began homeschooling was for two main concerns #1 I really didn't think five years old or six years old for that matter were old enough to be away from the nurturing love and 'safety net' of a mother AND #2 the negative influences from the non-parented students to the anti-christian environment that makes up our current public school systems. Those reasons alone are enough to make my stomach church and spur me to do whatever it takes to keep my children away from such entities.
Despite my current laundry list of reasons as to why I homeschool now, there are days (okay if I was being truthful ~ weeks, maybe even months) where I do not want to homeschool anymore. I have zero desire to do it. My heart simply isn't into it, and I would do anything to put my kids in any school system so long as their education wasn't solely resting on my shoulders. Sometimes the truth can be harsh and not-so-pretty, but that's just where I'm at these days.
When folks are touting all the awesomeness of homeschooling they have a tendency to leave out the nitty gritty details that homeschooling isn't always so glamorous. Sometimes, it downright stinks. There are some days when the non-stop character training (i.e. disciplining), refereeing, and pleading with children to just sit still and finish the one assignment put in front of them (that should have only taken 10 minutes to complete ~ but has droned on into hours) is enough to drive Mother Teresa to have a nervous breakdown. And when those awful no-good days become the norm ~ homeschooling just doesn't seem so appealing anymore.
If you have been homeschooling for any length of time and haven't had a rut of bad homeschool days ~ congratulations (I rejoice with you!!), but I have a feeling most of you have been there and many of you may find yourselves dreading the up and coming homeschool year. Trust me friend you are NOT alone! I have been there and this year has been one of those years. Even though I went through the motions of planning and prepping for our 2019-2020 homeschool year; I also spent and exorbitant amount of time researching a local private christian school. {{sigh}}
YEP, I am that mom. I won't lie or sugar coat it. I'm feeling the homeschool burn-out, and my desire to homeschool just isn't where it needs to be. But, I know there's really no other option for us and in my heart of hearts I do want my children to be at home and I really do love homeschooling. What really has me teetering on the edge of insanity is all the other stress that distracts from our homeschooling. Like the non-stop disciplining, appointments, external family drama, cooking, cleaning, you know.....life. And to add to my homeschool struggles; this year I'm officially teaching SIX grades plus two in preschool. To say I'm stretched thin, is putting it mildly!
I'm really not complaining. I know I have a great life. I know without a shadow of a doubt I am 100% called to this perfectly imperfect messy homeschool life. But, I want to be real. I want to share my trials as well as my triumphs. I want all you struggling homeschool mamas to know YOU are validated and it's okay to not have it all together, to not really be sold out to homeschooling (all the time), and that the only reason you keep on keeping on boils down to the simple fact that you KNOW you're called by God to homeschool.
I'm here to let you know YOU ARE NOT ALONE. We are in this together and we can do this. Even if the journey isn't as pretty as we thought it was going to be WE can finish the race God has set before us.
The never-ending, ever-draining, unappreciated task of educating children from home is certainly not for the faint of heart. The huge task cannot be undertaken without the strength and wisdom of the Lord. There's nothing like an emotionally draining day of child training coupled with trying to impart some sort of knowledge onto ungrateful children to bring you to your knees, broken before the Lord. When we feel like we cannot go another inch, correct another child, clean another mess, or teach another lesson; He can.
I'm not telling you that if you follow a serries of suggestions it's going to magically fix your homeschooling woes and restore your love affair with wth the art of homeschooling. Sheesh, sometimes wading through the muck and mire of the homeschool trenches can drag on and on with no easy fix, and that's okay. Don't think you're failing because homeschooling isn't easy. There will be times (even extended seasons) where it's really hard; but I know for a fact that if you're truly called to homeschool, God will sort the details out and carry you through.
One day all our hard work will be rewarded, even if it isn't on this side of heaven. I've learned over the years that answering the call and being obedient to The Lords commands doesn't always reap instant rewards. When it comes to homeschooling, I'm afraid for the most part, us mama's are storing up treasures in heaven. It will only be when we meet the Heavenly Father and hear those beautiful words: "Well done my good and faithful servant," that we will truly grasp the extent of what we did through the strength, love, grace, and mercy of The Lord. It will be in that moment where we will finally understand why we were one of the few called by God to educate our children at home.
Here's to putting one foot in front of the other and doing the best we can to make this an awesome homeschool year ~ we got this my dear sweet friends. 💗
With Love & Hope,
Jennifer
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